Happy LGBTQQIA+ Pride Month!

Written By Ed Center

announcements

Parents of teens and Bay Area educators and youth development folks! I’m volunteering with a new organization that aims to get more young folks of color into nature. They are hosting a free event for teens and families in August. Come join us!

the heart of the matter

It’s Pride Day in the SF Bay. Fifteen years ago, that meant I would be going from party to party to club to festival for three straight… er… queer days, and then “calling in gay” on Monday. Today, my husband and I may walk around the festival for a couple of hours. We’ll be home by five to meal prep, maybe watch some Netflix, and make sure the kids get to bed on time. 

I was 23 when I figured out that I was something other than heterosexual. It was 1995. It didn’t feel like “coming out” to me. I hadn’t been hiding. It felt like the pattern of the jigsaw puzzle became clear and the pieces fit together to form a picture. I felt fully me. 

I grieved two things: I would probably die young from AIDS, and I would never raise children. 

Every Pride Month I make time for grateful reflection. We’ve won progress. Medical advances have made HIV both preventable and manageable. I have a husband and two kids. My family composition isn’t unique or even interesting anymore. The idea of an openly queer parenting educator would have been unthinkable in ‘95. 

This progress wasn’t a gradual cultural evolution. The privileged never cede power to the oppressed without a fight. I’m grateful for my claimed queer ancestors and allies who fought, protested and resisted. These screaming queens would not be silenced and my privilege was won through their persistence, their strategy, and sometimes through their lives. 

We need to keep screaming. Today, all three federal branches, and many state governments  are engaged in a policy war against transgendered people. This movement is strategic and politically-tested. As acceptance of gays and lesbians spread across the country, the right discovered that Americans are less comfortable with transgendered people. Conservatives are able to galvanize (and raise money from) their evangelical and traditionalist base to regulate where transgendered folks use the bathroom, where and how they can access their health care, whether they can play sports, and even what pronouns can be used. I have no idea how pronoun control matters to non-queer people, or how any policy to control language isn’t tossed out as a first amendment violation. See below for a list of policies attacking queer people that have been enacted since Trump took office this year. 

Make the connection that other policies impact queer people. Cuts in Medicaid will limit health care for poor, transgendered, BIPOC, folks. Attacks on immigrants push queer, undocumented, people into the shadows, and it is often harder for these folks to find stability in the underground economy because of prejudice. 

The readership of this newsletter is educated, informed, and motivated. You have power. Make a commitment TODAY to use that power to stand up for queer rights in some way. Donate, advocate, volunteer. Here are some simple actions:

  • Buy a Pride Flag and hang it from in front of your house. You can fly the flag anytime of year.

  • Buy a Protect Trans Kids t-shirt or button and wear it all the time

  • Your local middle or high school probably has a Gay Straight Alliance. Find out who the faculty advisor is and write them a check for $100.

  • Take your kids to a mostly queer family event. Drag queen story hours are a hoot. What do drag queens and kids have in common? Songs, glitter, and feather boas.

  • If your place of worship isn’t inclusive, find one that is. When you switch, tell your pastor why.

  • Make a commitment to buying 50% of your holiday gifts from queer and trans businesses.

  • Plan your vacations in places that have inclusive policies. Canada seems nice these days.

  • My friend Adam runs an organization that helps LGBTQIA folks get asylum in the United States. You can imagine how hard shit is for them these days. Volunteer and donate. 

Let’s celebrate progress while we all channel our inner screaming queen. Happy and vigilant Pride. Keep fighting!

we’re obsessed with…

ending these policies that attack the queer community. Here’s a non-comprehensive list of executive orders and SCOTUS decisions that have come out since Trump took office (thank you, ChatGPT).

Federal Executive Actions

  • EO 14187 (Jan 28) – Banned gender-affirming care for under‑19s by cutting federal funding (Medicare/Medicaid, FEHB, VA) en.wikipedia.org+1actforpublichealth.org+1.

  • EO 14201 (Feb 5) – Prohibited transgender women/girls from competing on female sports teams in schools/colleges, penalizing institutions through funding withdrawal en.wikipedia.org+1actforpublichealth.org+1. Note from Ed: The debate always focuses on elite athletics like the Olympics, college scholarships, and high school state championships. However, the policy covers all transgendered girls in sports, meaning a transgendered 8th grader can’t join her school’s crappy soccer team.

  • EO 14183 (Jan 27) – Directed DoD to block transgender individuals’ military service beaumontenterprise.com+10actforpublichealth.org+10reddit.com+10.

  • EO 14190 (Jan 29) – Directed agencies to purge “gender ideology” from federal education and eliminate DEI programming glaad.org+11actforpublichealth.org+11williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu+11.

  • Federal agencies have removed LGBTQ+/gender identity data from CDC, Census, HIV/AIDS monitoring, undermining research and policymaking.

U.S. Supreme Court Decisions

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Ed Center, the founder of The Village Well, is a parenting coach and educator certified in the Triple P method. The Village Well is a community of parents in BIPOC families, focused on attaining more joy, calm, and meaning in family life. We coach parents to prioritize their own healing and wellness, deepen connections with their kids, and learn tools to support better behavior. Services include Parenting workshops, Parenting courses, and community events. Our support is culturally-grounded support and honors your unique family. Ready to stop yelling? Schedule a free consultation with one of our team members.

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