It's Time to Question Hustle Culture

The gist of things

It's Time to Question Hustle Culture

Yesterday, I read a LinkedIn post from an acquaintance of mine, a man of color, extolling the virtues of hustle. Here’s a snippet:

Years ago, I worked on a rotational program at a big company where every single person besides me had an Ivy League education.

They were all very bright, talented, and hard working.

I outhustled everyone.

When the annual review came, I was the one who got promoted.

I definitely wasn’t the smartest person on the team.

I wasn’t even the most talented.

But I worked harder than anyone else.

Education is great, but it means nothing if you don’t outhustle everyone else.

If you hustle, you can learn any skill.

You don’t need talent or an Ivy League education.

You just need to outhustle your competition.

Five years ago, I might have applauded or taken inspiration. I certainly did when I first saw this video of Dwayne Johnson inspiring NBA athletes to never be outworked.

“In the end, NO ONE WILL OUTWORK ME! No one.” - Dwayne Johnson

Now I view these messages through ambivalent lenses. They can be inspiring. They are also problematic. 

Well shit, Ed, is nothing sacred? Is nothing simple? Can’t we all agree that hard work is a good thing? 

Of course hard work is important. It’s a core value for many families including mine. It’s in my family’s holy trinity of values: Work hard, be nice, give back. 

To me, hustle culture goes beyond hard work. Notice that this LinkedIn post, as well as The Rock’s video don’t just extoll hard work; the messages push outworking everyone else. “Education is great, but it means nothing if you don’t outhustle EVERYONE else.” What are the costs to individuals, communities, and cultures, when we praise hustle culture? How does this impact our relationships, our physical and mental health, our sense of priorities? I note that both these messages are delivered by men of color. How does hustle culture impact folks of color as we build success in multiple aspects of our lives - our careers, sure, but also our families, our traditions, our wellness?

A main problem with Hustle Culture is that it places the onus of success and failure on the individual. Dwane Johnson’s personal success came through college football, professional wrestling, and movies. He had to beat people out for those positions. It makes sense that his motivational message focuses on outworking everyone around him. This is a powerful American myth that goes back to the Puritans, and has been used to justify centuries of policies that lift up the privileged few at the expense of the many. What policies? Here are some contemporary examples*. Raise your hand if…

You are worried about your retirement savings, but don’t feel like you can do much about it. 

• You struggle to contribute to your retirement account and save for your kid’s college at the same time. 

• You have ever done the calculation of Is it worth it to work if I have to pay that much for child care?

• You are in the “sandwich” generation, spending money, time, effort, and worry taking care of aging parents and younger children. Raise half a hand if you aren’t there yet, but you can see it around the corner. 

• If you are stressed about the amount of time you give or feel like you need to give for your career, but also don’t feel like you are able to give quality time and energy to your kids. 

• Oh and corporate offices want us back at work 3-5 days per week. 🖕🏾

• You’ve ever stayed at a crappy job because of health care. 

The above statements are struggles due to policy choices to privatize much of retirement, offer college as a luxury good, offer few childcare subsidies to the middle class, fail to offer a government-funded infrastructure for elder care, and pin health care to employment. The above examples are true family challenges. These are also middle class problems. Let’s look at the parallel issues faced by the working poor. 

• Your basic living expenses exceed your wages. You have no plan for retirement beyond social security. 

• You hope your children will go to college and succeed, but you have no savings plan for that. 

• You work a schedule that changes week to week making child care needs unpredictable. You rely mostly on family and friends because you can’t afford to pay for professional child care. 

• The multiple jobs you hold do not offer you enough hours for private insurance. You and your children are signed up for the Affordable Care Act, and the premiums are rough on your paycheck.

All of these are the result of policies that emphasize that successful individuals and families can purchase stability that isn’t afforded to others. This “success” is usually built on a foundation of generational wealth and extraction. We love the stories of the Dwayne Johnsons of the world because they keep perpetuating the myth of individual success and merit. 

I note that both these messages were delivered by men of color. Toxic masculinity isn’t just about flexing violent or assholic behavior. It’s also about buying into cultures of sacrifice and individuality at a cost to those around us. Seeing my success as dependent on your failure sustains cultures and systems grounded in zero sum games that don’t have to be true. We can hold that hard work is a virtue, AND we can promote cultures and policies that lift up cooperation and communal care. We can elevate systems of greater equity, less immense privilege, and the value of care for all community members (including the youngest, the oldest, the newest, and those who can’t care for themselves).

Here’s a wonderful irony: in Dwayne Johnson’s greatest family friendly performance, his character follows a developmental arc from stoic (and comedic) individualism to achieving success through connection and community. In Disney’s Moana, the demigod Maui (played by Johnson) initially sees himself as an individual savior of mankind. He hides deep insecurities - we love a generational trauma storyline! -  with big muscles, a bigger ego, and insisting on being called “Maui, Shapeshifter, Demigod of the Wind and Sea, Hero of Men and Women.” After his superpowers are curtailed and his childhood wounds exposed, he acknowledges his vulnerability and fully teams up with the adolescent girl Moana to win the epic battle. They do this not through defeating their enemy, but by recognizing her true nature, healing past harms, and bringing her back into rightfulness with nature and cosmic balance. 

I’ve taken comfort that in my preferred corner of Instagram, I see more and more attention to definitions of success that balance hard work with play and rest, and commitment with community. Yung Pueblo offers pithy poems to support our spiritual and psychological growth, often by lifting up healthy connections. Brown Girl Therapy offers mental health wisdom particularly for immigrants and children of immigrants. She helps me think about the importance of self-care and boundaries, while also acknowledging how challenging that can be in the context of strong family bonds. The Nap Ministry, oh how I love The Nap Ministry!, reminds us of the importance of rest, particularly for Black folks and other people of color. 

Finally, we need to push collectively for policy that upholds the collective above the individual. This is a newsletter for parents, so I want to celebrate the work of Parent Nation, a national organization pushing for family friendly policies. Their goal is to create a lobby of families, much like the AARP lifted the rights of seniors and because a formidable advocacy force in Washington and each state. 

I launched a business last year. I know I need to hustle and grind to be successful. Part of the reason I created my own organization was to get out of toxic work environments that saw me just as a producer and failed to support my values of self and community care, finding joy, and being a great husband and dad, principles I also emphasize in my positive parenting classes. I won’t repeat that same mistake for myself and those I work with.

*These are contemporary examples, but American policies based on protecting the few at the expense of the many started at our  foundation. Think about how early settlers, colonists, and farmers dehumanized whole races of people in order to justify kidnapping, land extraction, genocide, and slavery for the economic gain of a few. Think of the myth of the bold pioneer family - and I loved all The Little House on the Prairie Books as a child. These myths gloss over the removal and attempted erasure of indigenous peoples, and the growth of the economy on the backs of slaves’ labor. 

We’re obsessed with:

Playfulness. Pushing back on hustle culture creates space for childlike joy. This KQED perspective is a beautiful reminder of that. 

Balance. I was recently featured in a local article about bringing my pandemic drinking habit back under control. I want to help normalize that sometimes we lose our balance in various aspects of our lives. To rebalance, we need to reach out for support, and call in community. 

Mia Birdsong - Oakland author, activist, and mom. In line with this theme of pushing back on hustle culture, her book How We Show Up explores the radical ways that we can push back on what she labels American Dreamism. Connection, cooperation, and plenty of space for rest and play are at the center of the community models she highlights. Queer folks, black and brown women, and community organizers are often the co-creators of these communities. I found hope and validation in the ways that I can find support beyond my nuclear family. Damn her! I bought the audiobook but it generated so many thoughts that I had to buy the hard copy to write in the margins.

Black Rest - My dear friend and social entrepreneur Milicent Johnson founded The Octavia Fund to support rest and renewal for Black women leaders. Please share with folks who could use this! And throw this new org a few bucks in honor of Black History Month. 

Black History Month -  Get out there with your kids and learn and celebrate! Here are some options for our Bay Area fam.

Click here for Oakland events

Click here for San Francisco events

About us:

Ed Center, the founder of The Village Well, is a parenting coach and educator certified in the Triple P method. The Village Well is a community of parents in BIPOC families, focused on attaining more joy, calm, and meaning in family life. We coach parents to prioritize their own healing and wellness, deepen connections with their kids, and learn tools to support better behavior. Services include Parenting workshops, Parenting courses, and community events. Our support is culturally-grounded support and honors your unique family. Ready to stop yelling? Schedule a free consultation with one of our team members.