Calling in Community
announcements
Hi Fam. I have a soft launch announcement and a related request. In the three years that The Village Well has been around, I’ve worked with thousands of families, educators, and youth service providers to understand kids with big feelings and big behaviors. The majority of these kids have at least one disability; usually neurodiversity, a sensory processing challenge, a mental health diagnosis, or past trauma. Often families are navigating a complex combination of these across the adults and kids in the household. Over the next few months The Village Well will officially evolve into an organization that works with families, schools, and organizations to support kids with disabilities. You’ll see this reflected on our website, our social media presence, the workshops we offer, the partnerships we forge.
Here’s the request: you have a sister, cousin, bestie, or colleague who is raising a kid with a disability. Forward this newsletter to them and recommend signing up! You are connected to a school or organization that supports kids with disabilities. Maybe they are struggling to figure out how to provide the right level of inclusive care. Connect me! About 75% of the work I do comes through connections and referrals. Thanks for supporting this critical work.
What won’t change: We are still committed to serving families of color through culturally relevant work. We will always support families in our diverse forms: single parents, grandparents raising kids, queer families, foster families, blended families. We continue to help schools and organizations work with kids with big feelings and big behaviors - now we offer a more precise “why” for these kids, and better strategies to support them.
It’s been an amazing three years. We are just getting started. Thanks for taking this journey with us.
Be Well!
ed
the heart of the matter
Three weeks ago, I had the hardest day of my life.
My teenager moved out of the house. We found a boarding school that was a perfect fit for them (non-binary they/them). It’s located on a 1,000 acre ranch with horses, alpacas, and a charming old goat named Lucifer. It has woodworking, metalworking, bike repair, and a pond for stone skipping and fly-fishing. We believe this will be a place where my child can heal and thrive.
But my baby was leaving the house and they didn’t want to go. I didn’t want them to go either. My vision of parenting doesn’t involve sending my kid away at 14, even if that’s what they need. As we approached moving day, I was flooded with all the feels - grief, frustration, fear, and also hope.
Parenting a child with a disability can feel so isolating. I often feel like no one can understand our experience. Sometimes I share things with loved ones and it confirms the isolation.
My mom asks why my kid decides to get so aggressive and angry. My kiddo isn’t deciding to have a debilitating mental health issue.
Friends will say, “Yes, the teenage years are so hard.” This is far beyond teenage expression of independence.
Others will say, “If I had done that when I was a kid, my mom would have beat the shit out of me, and I turned out okay.” If you think I should beat the mental health challenges out of my kid, I’m not sure you turned out okay.
Faced with these interactions, I turn inward. I smile more and say less. I keep my family life private.
“How are you doing?” they say.
“Fine,” I reply. “Things are just fine.”
As moving day approached, I felt my soft underbelly exposed. But I knew I couldn’t do this alone. I knew I needed help from people who love us. So I pushed past my fear and reached out. I sent texts to five or six people saying I needed love and spiritual support. The bat signal declared, “We are accepting prayers in all denominations.” The folks I texted weren’t necessarily my best friends. They were people I knew would understand the assignment. And wow, they showed up big.
Karina and Milicent lit candles and said prayers on their home altars.
Sarah sent love from her yoga mat.
Jordan dropped off a pizza.
Savitha said, “I’ll get to work right away. We have a lot of gods, but they are always caught up in mischief. It takes some effort to get them to focus.”
Everyone checked-in and also respected my space.
When I woke up on Move-in day, I felt wrapped in peace and love. I was calm. I was rooted. That feeling stayed with me throughout the intense day. It WAS difficult. My kid protested, lashed out, laid bare their anger, fear, and resentment. I stayed calm. I stayed loving. I found calm in the eye of that hurricane moment. We got my kiddo to the school and now can start a new journey as a family. We can all do the work of healing and rebuilding. In that work, I am certain that I am not alone.
we’re obsessed with:
The Wild Robot movie. The Wild Robot book is about a robot who washes up on an island filled with animal life and learns to adapt to her environment. The movie is about that, but it's also about motherhood, patience, crushing obligation, sacrifice, transformation, resilience, love, and radical community. It's also visually stunning, and offers unexpected dark humor. Watch this even if you don't have a young child. On Netflix.
where we’ve been
In partnership with the Center for Children and Youth, we delivered two workshops—"Power Without Struggle" and "How to Stay Calm When Your Kids Are Not"—to both the Center's network and the Stanford Work/Life Office community. These workshops focused on equipping parents and professionals with practical strategies for effective child guidance.
At the 39th Annual Children’s Network Conference in San Bernardino, our workshop “Healing with Cultural Wisdom” offered a vital shift in practice. Participants discovered how to move beyond standard models and into culturally grounded care that respects the unique traditions, strengths, and resilience of diverse communities. This provided professionals with actionable insights for building more equitable and affirming services that truly meet family needs.
Book a workshop for your school or organization.
Bring The Village Well to your school or organization. We provide powerful, interactive and fun workshops for parents and/or staff. Learn more.
Ed Center, the founder of The Village Well, is a parenting coach and educator certified in the Triple P method. The Village Well is a community of parents in BIPOC families, focused on attaining more joy, calm, and meaning in family life. We coach parents to prioritize their own healing and wellness, deepen connections with their kids, and learn tools to support better behavior. Services include Parenting workshops, Parenting courses, and community events. Our support is culturally-grounded support and honors your unique family. Ready to stop yelling? Schedule a free consultation with one of our team members.
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